A Blunt Dagger to the Heart

T’was the seventh night before Christmas. The roaring fire has filled the room with heat as Bing is warbling away on the wireless, crooning out a festive tune like no other. But yet, there is nearly fifty Sutton fans who’ve made the trip to East London on a cold Tuesday night to see if our […]

Read More… from A Blunt Dagger to the Heart


A wise man once said “Fail to prepare, prepare to fail”. Who was it? Dunno, not looked it up. You’ve got the Googles right? Look it up yourselves then you lazy sods! Anyway, I digress. Whoever it was that said it had a point. And usually here at Gandermonium, we’re not too bad at preparation. […]

Read More… from Planespotting

A Tale of two Arses

Ah, Tuesday night away football, Conference-style. You can very much take it or leave it as the saying goes. But for 20+ hardy Sutton United souls, it’s very much take what we can as we have to make another long midweek Northern trip. And some of the matches we’ve been to a cold Tuesday night haven’t […]

Read More… from A Tale of two Arses

Harold Shipman’s Manor

As you get older in life, you may find that certain things become that bit harder. Things ache a bit more and you take longer to recover when you exert yourself . And you might not know it, but this is as true when it comes to following a non-league football club as it is when […]

Read More… from Harold Shipman’s Manor

Two Out of Three Ain’t Bad

Well loyal readers it has been a while since yours truly blessed with my writings based upon a Sutton United blog, thanks again to our editor and chief Taz for stepping in for me that night I had the flu jab and my left side went into complete numbness. You shouldn’t believe all the scandalous […]

Read More… from Two Out of Three Ain’t Bad

An Inspired Substitution

So the U’s have done it once again. There’s been a few, if rare, times that we seem to upset those on Social Media who like to have a little flutter and bank on a Sutton defeat in their accas this season. And yes, we’ve once again caused them to wish bankruptcy, death and all […]

Read More… from An Inspired Substitution

Bubble Blowing Oompa Loompa

As a wise man once said “It’s not the despair. I can take the despair. It’s the hope I can’t stand”. A quote that sounds like it was created purely for following a rubbish football team the length and breadth of a nation, but sadly was actually dreamt up by some script writer for John […]

Read More… from Bubble Blowing Oompa Loompa

Dirty Barry’s Dirty Weekend

Back in the seventies – will you stop fucking groaning at the back – back in the seventies the Dirty Weekend was a staple of British comedy and as much a part of popular culture as Glam Rock, Spangles and a clip round the earhole from you friendly neighbourhood copper. I have no recollection of […]

Read More… from Dirty Barry’s Dirty Weekend

A Boost of Confidence

Sorry folks, it’s only me again at the reins of yet another Sutton United tale from the boys at Gandermonium. But to make things even worse (for you), it’s that time of the year where a certain cup competition begins, one that has become the bane of the short-minded and the obsessive love of the […]

Read More… from A Boost of Confidence

They Call Me Wendy at Weekends

It’s not happening at the moment is it for the poor boys of lil’ old Sutton United. We can’t buy a win for love or money currently. The worst thing is that we’re not playing that badly really, but we just can’t seem to put the ball into the back of the net. Gravesend & […]

Read More… from They Call Me Wendy at Weekends