Liquid Soap

There are some things we’re getting used to in League Two. Away ticketing arrangements that vary insidiously from one game to another. Soulless, tinny, edge-of-town stadia surrounded by traffic-clogged roads and retail parks (the old town centre grounds having long since been flogged for development). And coming up against clubs we’d previously known best from […]

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Britain’s Biggest Newt Pond

Port Vale now is it? We seem to be rolling our way through all those old Fourth Division clubs that used to get spewed out on the Grandstand teleprinter when we were kids and life was better and we satisfied ourselves with the simple pleasures in life like shooting each other with spud guns, shoplifting […]

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Poundland Cyberman

I’d first like to thank the top brass at Gandermonium for letting me contribute my debut Sutton United match blog. I’ve thrown some random pieces in the pot before on subjects as diverse as Sunday League football and trips down 1980’s English waterways which should surely have put them off. However like lambs to the […]

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Saucy Postcards

I’m something of a connoisseur of popular culture. Never tried to hide it. Never needed to. I like those glimpses of life that open a window into a world that’s passed by. Adverts in old football programmes are a rich source of such snippets but I’m here right now to open this loosely branded “match […]

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Not On the Side of Nature

I spend my professional life writing for other people, but the past few years have given rise to such footballing pride, that words are quite simply bursting out of me right now. I have two footballing loves, Liverpool and Sutton United, and that won’t change until the day I die. The backstory is that I […]

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The Promised Land

As a lifelong Fulham fan the 2020-21 season will very easy to brush under the carpet. To be fair when I last got to Craven Cottage in the flesh they were in the Championship and by the time I get back there next season (fingers crossed) that’s where I’ll still find them. Although in the […]

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Fortune Favours the Bald

As the champagne was being sprayed all round the joint and our extraordinary group of players went through their party moves to the sounds of their enormous travelling boom box Taz lent across to me and said “So, d’you think you’ve got enough material for the blog then…” Football. I mean, bloody hell Isn’t it? […]

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Norman Milne – Cult Hero

News that Sutton’s latest fixture at Wrexham has been postponed due to Coronavirus issues at the Welsh club is yet another sad reminder of the effect COVID-19 is having. Football may be considered trivial in comparison to lives being lost but for those passionate about the game, being denied our regular fix of seeing our […]

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Hearty in Hartlepool

One of the great things about football away trips is that they take you to places you’d probably otherwise never visit. Often you discover that a distant town you’d idly dismissed as dull/grim/rougher than Mitcham is actually rather interesting, sometimes even welcoming. They do say that travel broadens the mind. One northern town I unexpectedly […]

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