Breaking the Code

After Saturday’s steel toe cap to tender fragile body parts around the waist area episode still fresh in the old memory banks, we’re having to dust ourselves off sharpish as we’re back on the road again, this time in the EFL League Cup, sponsored by a product no can pronounce and can ever remember seeing […]

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How Many Ajiboyes Is That?

After last week’s opening day stalemate with Newport, attention this week turned to our first awayday of the new season with a tramp up North, a new ground tick and to face one of last season’s L1 trapdoor outfits in Doncaster Rovers. Tickets were booked for this one as soon as the fixtures were out […]

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New Season, Newport

So here we are again ladies & gents. Another season is upon us and my god it doesn’t half swing round at a rate of knots eh? Only seems like last week we were on the beer in Harrogate wrapping up our maiden Football League season and feeling a bit sorry for ourselves at missing […]

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Final Rehearsal

So it’s all come to this. The final preparations for our second season in the football league wouldn’t have been complete without a good ol’ barmy with Bromley. As per every season, there have been changes. Old friends have left, new lads have arrived. What’s most important though, particularly during these fitness-testing warm ups, is […]

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Love Fifteen

So here is my first attempt at covering a Sutton game for the famous Gandermonium blog, the pre-season friendly against Woking. Of course, I have studied with a lot of attention the style of the original writings from this place and discovered that they would most necessarily involve a detailed description of the travel needed […]

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Wear Sunscreen

Oh, hello there. Uh, what are you hanging about for? We’re not kicking off for another couple of weeks yet! Then we’ll be right back to our usual blend of nonsense, swearing, drinking and occasionally mentioning the football! What’s that? “Pre-season” you say? Who the hell wants to read about that? I mean, they’re just […]

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Enough Beetroot?

The last time I was at Havant we were at the arse end of the Vanarama South league and my Dad still had some colour in his hair – but having only started to follow Sutton the season previous the hair had been slowly going greyer with every loss on the record. Yet with every […]

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Two’s Company

We’re back. Anyone else think it’s about a month too soon, a lifetime even? As regular readers will deduce, this is a guest appearance so no lurid tales of ridiculous levels of alcohol intake, no caustic remarks about other members of the crew but in keeping with this establishment’s ethos, not much about a football […]

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Viral Tik Toks

“No blog?? On top of no season review? Sacrilege! I’ll rectify that”, I say to myself as I scroll through Twitter, slouched into the sofa, beer in hand heart just about recovering from the night’s events. “Another thriller at Meadowbank?” I hear you cry. Alas, no. Sleepy Jr. has simply just given me a mild […]

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