Borg-er Off Urchins!

RYMAN PREMIER DIVISION

Att: 547



SUTTON UNITED – 3     [J.Nurse 28.72. Bailey 61p]

HORNCHURCH – 1     [Douglas 41]



Match Reporter: Gareth

I don’t like George Borg.

Never have done, never will do. In my humble opinion, the man is a Grade A twat. And, once again, he proved that despite his 50-odd years, he is still capable of behaving like a spoilt 6 year old having his sweets taken off him.

He’s not even a good manager – he proved that at Aldershot. I have no idea how much money he squandered at the Rec, but it certainly can’t have done his CV any good which makes it all the more puzzling why the multi-millionaire Urchins employed him.

Anyway, today started around lunchtime in the Robin, with myself, Greek and Chalmers agreeing to meet early to belatedly celebrate our Mediterranean friend’s birthday. A few beers later, we arrive at the ground as the players are coming out onto the pitch.

The team is unchanged from last Saturday’s stuffing of champions-elect Canvey. However, this time the wind was against us in the first half, causing a few nervy moments early on while Andy Iga got used to his kicking. A couple of early Hornchurch corners caused no real problems, and at the other end Sutton were denied a penalty by referee Ford when Nicky Bailey sent a looping header into the area and Matt Fowler was bundled over.

The game then seemed to die a death for the next quarter of an hour with misplaced passes all over the place, but on 24 minutes, a Tobi Jinadu ball in from the left was flicked on by Jon Nurse and Fowler blasted over.

Shortly after, Matt Hanlan took a throw in deep in the U’s half to Matt Gray, who then decided to go on one of his runs down the line that would scare the shit out of any full-back. Squaring the ball to Matt Fowler about 6 yards out, it seemed a certain goal, but Fowler seemed to scuff the ball wide.

Cue instant curse under breath by yours truly.

However, what I failed to see from my position on the Shoebox was Jon Nurse steaming in behind him, and he managed to get on the end of Matt’s fine scuff/pass and poke the ball past the Urchins’ keeper.

Cue instant retraction of aforementioned curse and suitable celebration of a finely worked goal. Keep working on those scuffs in training Matty!!

Now we are beginning to become accustomed to the opposition rallying immediately after we score, so perhaps the next attack was unsurprisingly from Hornchurch only a couple of minutes later. A corner from our left went deep into our penalty area and Gary Abbott  (How old is he now???) rose strongly and sent a looping header over Iga but it luckily bounced off the bar and Quincy got rid of the immediate danger by heading out for another corner.

Another period of scrappy play followed, but Hornchurch finished the half stronger and got another corner on our left shortly before half time. Again, it went deep and Locke’s shot was parried well by Andy Iga, but Andy Douglas was waiting to knock the ball in from 5 yards.

Bugger. Time for a beer I believe.

Sutton started the second half much stronger, with Fowler receiving a short throw in, twisting and turning to get some room before squaring a perfect ball to Nicky Bailey that was just knocked away before the ginger one slotted it home.

With the hour mark just gone, Eddie Akuamoah scampered down the left and played a great through ball to Bailey. He crossed just to far but Matt Gray retrieved the ball on the right and cross was just cut out by a Hornchurch defender and put out for a corner. The resulting corner was headed out as far as Quincy, who piled on more pressure on the Urchins defence with another deep cross, but despite it looking as though Fowler would have no chance getting on the end of it, he received a needless shove in the back from a Hornchurch defender.

I never did shake his hand after for that. The referee pointed straight to the spot, Nicky Bailey grabbed the ball and, remembering last week’s thrice taken penalty, I shouted a lot at the linesman to make sure he was watching whether the keeper came off his line. It was unnecessary though, as Bailey blasted the ball just to the keeper’s left to make it 2-1.

Then, Georgie boy REALLY made my day by having one of his temper tantrums. He jumped up and down about, spat his dummy at the ref and got sent off. Fantastic – glad to see you’re still a tosser Borg – just hope the FA get to hear about this latest incident in your immaculate managerial career.

It wasn’t long before Jon Nurse put the game beyond any doubt when Matt Gray passed inside to Quincy. TQ returned the ball to Matt, who lobbed the ball over the Urchin defender and straight to the feet of Jon Nurse. This time it was Nurse’s turn do his “running very fast with the ball and generally scaring the shit out of every opponent” thing and he cut in from the right and brilliantly sidefooted the ball round the keeper from the edge of the 18-yard box.

Jon nearly got his first hat-trick in Sutton colours just after, striking the ball from 25 yards out, but the keeper just managed to scramble the ball round the post. The boys were really flying now, and I’m sure even the most optimistic of Urchin fans would admit that another 2 or 3 Sutton goals wouldn’t have flattered us, and in the closing ten minutes, Eddie and Matt Gray both went close, and, in the best move of the match, Bailey fed Gray down the right who danced around 2 players and, just before being cynically brought down in the area, squared the ball to Tony Quinton whose shot wrong-footed the keeper, but somehow he managed to stretch his trailing leg out and push it round the post.

With 6 points in 2 games against Canvey and Hornchurch, we were understandably in suitable drinking mood back at the Robin….not too sure what happened after though!!

MAN OF THE MATCH: A hard choice, but I’m going to give it to Patsy

ENTERTAINMENT: Not as free flowing as Canvey, but I’d give it a 7

TEAM: Iga, Gray, Akuamoah, Palmer, Jinadu, Bailey, Quinton, Honey, Fowler, Hanlan, J Nurse.

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