Same Shit, Different Day


Att: 499

GRAVESEND & NORTHFLEET – 2  [Hegley 80. Booth 84]

SUTTON UNITED – 2  [OG 29. Nartey 79]

What is it with this place in bloody Kent?? Every time we come here, we play like utter wankers, performing like we’ve never even seen a football, let alone kicked one before.

Christ, I’d understand if it was a seething cauldron of a place with 75000 partisan fans baying for our blood, but it’s not. It’s just up the road from ‘Bluewater’ and there’s barely 500 of us here. Fucks sake.

Even more wonderful, was the fact that I had to watch this shit completely sober as I was designated mug….er…..driver for the day. In fact, the drive there and back was probably the most successful part of the day.

The team was shuffled once again, with Mo-Jo starting up front with Nartey. Both sears and Westcott were dropped and we appeared to line up in that fucking awful 3-5-2 formation that’s failed us a million times before (and will fail us a million times more before certain people work it out). Naturally we’re not that impressed.

Both sides start brightly enough and both Mo-Jo and Nartey are chasing through balls almost immediately. Little do we realise now, but this is about as dangerous as we’re gonna get all bloody afternoon. The home side are just like Hampton. Not much special, but bugger me do they work hard. If their forwards had been better, they’d have had us dead and buried by half time. (God I’m getting bored of writing that!) As with Tuesday, most of our attacks flounder on their offside/incompetent arse with flag trap. Our best chances fall to Nartey, sent through by our best (and probably ONLY) exchange of passes all day. Drawing the ‘keeper off his line he sends his chip too high and over the bar and Mo-Jo, who fails to direct as free a header as you’re ever liklely to get, even close to the target. Mo-Jo and Harford both then depart near the end of the half through injury. Nko and Thompson replace. (Obviously Nko’s Chesham rumour was just that)

Not much happens until just before the half hour when a low Walker cross is turned into his own net by their No5. The amusing thing is, there’s not a Sutton player within sodding miles! This sparks the home side and quite how they don’t draw level, I still don’t know. First their No9 miskicks horribly straight at Howells when he really should have scored, then a ball in from the touchline evades everyone and Gareth is hugely relived to see it bobble back off the inside of his right hand post. Then another forward blazes miles over when very well placed. If,  like most of our opponents so far this season, this lot could actually finish, we’d be in the bottom 3 by now.

So we’re understandably a bit relieved to actually go in 1 up at half time. We hope that JR and the gang get their arses in gear second half and secure the points. Fat chance.

If anything, we actually get worse. Standing and watching your team stand and watch the oppo literally camped out in your half is not a lot of fun. Neither is watching your club skipper wander aimlessly around, miles out of position, pissing away possession in an increasingly embarrassing manner. Cheers Dave.

Again, quite how the home side DON’T draw level amazes me. Time and again, they breach our increasingly shambolic rearguard only to fail miserably to finish or be denied by the once again excellent Howells. When they do finally beat Gareth, Ryan Palmer is there to stop the bal on the line & hoof it to safety. With around 15 minutes to play, the Sutton support still awaits a shot on target at the Gravesend goal by a SUTTON player. It comes from the boot of the poorly supported and supplied Joe Nartey. He gets the ball around 35-40 yards out on the  left touchline. He bundles past one home player and advances before bulldozing past another and nodding the bouncing ball on. Suddenly, he finds himself 8 yards out from goal, with only the ‘keeper to beat. He does’nt miss. Lashing the ball into the top corner.

Bloody hell, we’ve played like twats and we’re 2-0 up, can’t last surely!!

It doesn’t! The ref, who’s spent the entire second half awarding free kicks to the home side, makes another piss poor descision. Awarding a drop ball for a foul on Nko!! Gravesend eventually work the ball into the box and a forward nips in front of the once more exposed Howells to poke the ball home. Here we go…

2 minutes later and a high pass from deep is chested down by a striker in acres of space. For once he does’nt miss. 2-2 and with our lot even not able to manage anything more than passing to the opposition or hoofing the ball into the neighbouring streets a late winner looks on the cards. But thankfully, Gravesend return to their former selves and blow 2 absolute sitters to win the match.

So another performance that could be labelled as ‘complete bollocks’.  It’s desperately clear that midfield is still our BIG concern. Harlow is frankly terrible. His form is as bad, if not worse than last season and without Dack to make him look remotely competent, it’s showing very badly. Quite how this bloke is in the side let alone captain is beyond me. Another man we need to call time on, is Gwynne Berry. He’s had it and we know it, so why the fuck do we keep sticking him in week in week out to expose our already awful defence to more horrors?? Jesus, playing like this and Casuals will have a field day…

MAN OF THE MATCH : Gareth Howells. Kept us in a game for the gazillionth time in 2 seasons.

ENTERTAINMENT : 4. My god we were shit.

TEAM : Howells, Berry, Walker, Gray, Hammonds, Palmer, Harford, Harlow, Bolt, Nartey, Mahoney-Johnson   SUBS : Thompson, Ekoku, Westcott

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