Ross Is Back. Sadly.


Att: 601

SUTTON UNITED – 0          


Let me explain. You may remember from the K’s Away report my little tirade about the official that day. Mr Joe Ross of Chingford.

If I may qoute from that report to sum up my feelings :

“I don’t pay my money on a saturday to see some power crazed wanker dressed in black flashing cards at all and sundry for bugger all, whilst ignoring blatant foul play. I can only hope that we’ve seen the last of this fucking idiot”

Yeah, you guessed it. We got the twat again. And he was even worse. I don’t know if he’s got something against the U’s but it’s certainly beginning to look like it. I sincerely hope that the club mark this c**t as low as possible for this game. If they require anyone to go up before the FA and explain in full why this useless fucking arsehole was given -244 out of 10 on the match card, I’ll gladly volunteer. People may moan about the amount of stick refs get and yeah, I accept that they’re human and make mistakes. But it’s so hard to remain objective when utter tossers like Ross prance and posture around like some sad little demi-god. Like I said above Mr Ross, I don’t pay my 7 quid or so to observe useless shite like you. My own team are handling that quite nicely on their own ta very much.

The match itself was a pretty dull lifeless affair. The U’s of course relegated on Saturday and Dover sitting nicely in the top 5 with nothing to really play for. Quite what the visitors thought of this particular meeting was obvious when they left out top scorer Vansittart and midfielder Le Bihan.

 Our own side remained much the same as normal and frankly I can’t be arsed to run through the few changes.

Both sides huffed and puffed throught the first 45 minutes with little goalmouth action of any note. The U’s best chances came from a near post Winston header that he’s unable to direct to any great effect and an awful attempt at a diving header from a free kick by Paul Sears just a yard out.

The main event of the first half is naturally supplied by the incompetent arsehole in black. Having already booked Ekoku for probably asking the time or some other heinous crime he then sends off the big attacker in the most dramatic of circumstances.

A corner is played in to the back post but no Sutton player is near it (As per bloody normal). Two Dover defenders and ‘keeper Paul Hyde get a little confused and leave it for each other. Nko natrually goes for the ball, but before he can get there Hyde gathers the ball up and one of the defenders moves to shield his ‘keeper from the approaching Ekoku. Nko runs into the back of the shielding defender, knocking him into Hyde. Ross blows for a free kick, the defender gets up and brushes himself down in an ‘All part of the job’ manner and Hyde places the ball for the free kick. Ross then proceeds to run 20 yards to intercept the now retreating Ekoku to deliver a rather unecessary, yet severe reprimand. Nko rather understandibly reacts slighty and backchats the Ref.

 Cue a massive over-reaction from Ross. He blows long on his whistle and runs towards the corner flag , clearly reaching for a card. We groan at the impending second caution that this fucking idiot has simply been DYING to issue. Nko reacts a touch worse than us! He goes mental, chasing after the official, almost knocking Mark Watson flying. Ross is forced to retreat right off the pitch almost back to the perimeter fence at the GGL end pursued by the raging Nko. Ross issues the yellow and then the red, but this only serves to piss Nko off even further and just as it seems the big man is actually going to do some damage to the complete fuckwit, Dover’s ‘keeper grabs our man from behind and literally drags him away. It takes 2 other U’s players to persuade Ekoku to leave the field of play. When Hyde places the ball back for the original free kick, even his glance towards the ref seems to indicate that the decision was way over the top.

So Mr Ross gets his wish and completely fucks up another football match with his ‘Look at me!’ posturing.

Half time finally arrives and Mr Inept Twat is loudly booed off by the crowd in the stand, including the suits! We all hope he stays inside for the second half.

As per normal, all the sides above us are winning. Not that it matters now!

The second half is just as drab as the first, but with the visitors making one or two openings. One shot is driven over with Howells nowhere. Sammy blows our only real chance of the match when clean through. His pathetically weak shot isn’t even close to being on target.

Thankfully Ross is keeping a far lower profile this half. Whether the close escape of a bloody good slap at the hands of our 6 foot odd forward has been the cause or not we can’t be sure, but we’d like to think so!

Dover take the lead in somewhat unsurprisingly fortunate circumstances. A long ball forward is chased by ex-U Mark Hynes, pursued by creaking centre back Berry. Gwynne manages to get goalside of the striker but is clearly going to lose a straight sprint for goal. His desperate lunge at the ball in an attempt to clear sends a perfectly weighted chip over the astonished Howells and into the net. We’re not too shocked by this most comical of OG’s.

Brodrick, Forrester and Barclay are all thrown on to try and rescue some sort of reward from the game but despite some nice footwork by Barclay that allows Forrester to shoot narrowly over, the U’s threaten the visitors little and another poxy 1-0 defeat is registered.

I simply can’t wait for this season to be over. The team are clearly just turning up and going through the motions. If we actually manage to score again this season, I’ll be amazed.

As for Joe Ross of Chingford, if I ever see that knob again it’ll be too soon.

MAN OF THE MATCH : Nko Ekoku. If only he’d actually got to twat that tosser of a ref……

ENTERTAINMENT : 4. Dull end of season fare.

TEAM : Howells, Berry, Harford, Skelly, Brooker, Harlow, Sears, Rowlands, Ekoku, Winston, Watson SUBS : Brodrick, Barclay, Forrester, Newhouse.

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