Didn’t Wanna Go To Yeovil Anyway…

CONFERENCE LEAGUE CUP 1st ROUND

Att: 652

After Extra Time



Hereford United – 2   [May 96, 103]

Sutton United – 0

The title says it all really. We’ve been to Huish Park already, knicked 3 points and we have absolutely no desire to go back there until (we hope!) next season. Especially as we have our re-arranged game at Forest Green the following week. Thanks, but no thanks.

We buggered off from Sutton at 2.30pm with Cardiff in mind for our first ickle pit stop. Just before 5pm and a flick through this months FHM and we’re in the Taffy capital. A bit of pissing around and we eventually find the first boozer. Pint swallowed and we go in search of the second. It turns out the ‘Flyhalf’ is dead opposite Cardiff’s new Millennium stadium. Bloody impressive it is too as a stroll back to the car after pint No 2 allows us to have a nosey. If Wembley is anything like that when it’s finally done, we’ll have one hell of a national stadium.

Next up is a sprint to Newport (hey it was on the way OK!) and another of the soon to be extinct Firkin chain is crossed off the list. Then a mad frantic dash to Hereford see’s us in the ground with 5 minutes to spare. Unfortunately, despite us going through the ‘Away’ bloody turnstile, we arrive on a sparsely but wholly Hereford populated terrace. That’s clever. The stewards helpfully then move us via the outside of the pitch where we enjoy a brief kickabout with Dacky during the warm up before taking our places in the correct part of the ground with the 20 odd other hardy (mental? crazy? stoopid?) souls in Choc n Amber.

We have an early opportunity when Nko sends a fierce shot in, which their ‘keeper does well to save.

But the half is mainly the home side doing all the probing but like the league game at our place, they don’t seem able to produce much despite boasting the most prolific front 2 in the league (14 goals between ‘em so far). Gareth has to make a smart stop after about half an hour which is his first serious involvement in the game.

Half time and the food bar yeilds a damn fine burger. Sadly I have to mortgage my soul to afford it. I ask you. £2.10 is a bit much for something that’s smaller than what you’ll find in yer average ‘Happy Meal’. Nice, but blooooooody pricey. Suppose some poor bastards got to pay for this lot to stay full time. I just wish it was’nt me…..

Early on Sammy goes on a charge and his ball accross the edge of the box finds Harlow, who rather than unleash a piledriver into the top corner, passes it to a defender. Arse. Again the home side look the better of the sides but have very little bite up front although Howells makes 2 fine stops late on. By half 9, we’re checking our watches. Bugger, extra time is looming. This is going to seriously eat into our drinking time and more to the point, I’m bloody starving. Few minutes later and we’re into the thoroughly un-necessary extra 30 minutes. Useless bastards. What more do they want us to do? We bring a makeshift team down, expecting ‘em to give us a slapping and they can’t manage just one smegging goal.

What makes matters worse is that halfway through the first extra period, sub Leroy May rises at the near post and his glancing header nestles inside the back stick. Tossers. Why was’nt he bloody on an hour ago. Inconsiderate wankers if you ask me. Then horribly, we try & equalize. Sammy smashes a blistering strike in from 20 yards which the ‘keeper spills. Frankie Vines steams in with the goal at his mercy. And has the few people on the terrace behind the goal scattering for cover as his shot clears the crossbar. ARSE!

Then just before the break and the late arriving Leroy May confirms we’re officially NOT going to Yeovil on a crap tuesday evening. He takes another cross and fires past Gareth from around 8 yards. Our lot get offended by this and Dacky hits the base of the post just moments later. Sammy is unable to finish off the rebound and Vines somehow scoops the ball wide from 5 yards with the goal again at his mercy.

Final whistle and we head off to locate the Hereford Firkin, park up and nip to the nearest chippy. One sausage & chips later, I feel human again. A couple of pints in the friendly boozer follow with the locals only too happy to natter about their boys and how we’re doing this season. Very Sociable.

Enjoy Yeovil lads. You’re welcome to it.

MAN OF THE MATCH : Gareth Howells/Nko Ekoku

ENTERTAINMENT : 7. Not a bad game of footy.

TEAM : Howells, Harford, Brooker, Riley, Sears, Harlow, Dack, Ekoku, Skelly, Winston, Watson. SUBS: Hutchinson, Forrester, Rogers, Vines

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